i wanted to be better for him and now that he's gone i have no reason to be anything other than what i am. he made me want to be better, but i let him slip like sand through my fingers, not realising what he meant until it was too late.
even now i don't know if i loved him, or if i just loved the idea of loving him. or perhaps more accurately: i loved the idea of him loving me.
but it's over. today i try and be strong. i go downstairs and spoon mouthful after mouthful of cereal into my unwilling body. i make a new pact.
tomorrow i will put on my grey-blue dress and be alice.
this is your last chance to save me. hurry. it's almost too late.
Oh my dear, I wish I could take away your pain. Stay better for yourself, for your family, friends, blog readers, for me, a stranger. You are worth more than what might have been.
ReplyDeleteStay strong and don't fall, please.
If you need anything don't hesitate to contact me.
hugs <3
Don't fall.
ReplyDeleteYou are too too precious.
Stay strong <3
</3
ReplyDeleteEveryday is a new begining.
You don't have to be anything other than what you are, not for him nor for anyone else. But the *desire* you had to be strong and to be better,m that's a part of you, too. So be just what you are, and be strong, but for yourself. Princesslila is right, and puts it beautifully; you are worth more than what might have been. Don't throw away how far you've come.
ReplyDeleteOh, please don't fall. Here's the deal: you don't fall, I keep trying not to jump. Okay? <3
ReplyDeleteAvalanche