a week ago tonight my sister tried to kill herself. i rang an ambulance, legs shaking, teary eyed. i had to sit in the bathroom with her, holding my hand between the shower wall and her head so she wouldn't knock herself out. they took her away. sam and i cried and he slept in my bed.
i felt like it was my fault.
every night since then i cross my fingers and pray it doesn't happen again. please, please, please god. please.