he loves me.
i knew that, i just didn't want to admit it. i wanted to flirt, but i didn't want to be in love. does that mean it's all my fault?
i can't do this now. two months ago i was on the brink of killing myself. i still can't eat three meals a day without wanting to puke. i need to get better first.
i say i'm not ready. he says there's no rush. i say," if you can wait for me, fine. but if not, then that's okay too. i'm not the only girl there is."
he says, "i know. if i find anyone who can compare to you then i'll think about it. i don't think that would happen though."
we live in a small town. do we need to settle for each other?
i try not to cry. then i say, "i'm sorry i'm not who you thought i was."
he tells me it's okay, it's just made him like me even more.
he hugs me hard before i get into my car. "friends?" i say. "friends," he says.
whatever that means.