you are back

i watch the rest of p.s. i love you. i cry. my mother leaves for the city and doesn't hug me goodbye (i'm 20, this should not matter). i cry. my cat bleeds all over the bed and i ring my dad (i bawl my eyes out). i take him to the vet. i cry. philippa is nice, but she does not understand why i am upset. my cat is not dying.

still i cry.

at the end of three and a half days of not thinking or talking and showering once and smiling even less i know what i need.

i missed you.